2012 In Review

We all review the year about now and look at the new year. Ok, nothing new or news there or here, but it was an interesting year in summary, the first half looking real good for seeing real change in my life and the second half watching it all unravel into pieces and nothingness.

Yeah, from great to terrible and next year doesn't look better outside of I'll be on an austerity program and budget for the next 2-3 years to climb out of debt for some other things I planned about now and won't happen.

So what happened? Well, the first six months were productive for the Mt. Rainier NP photo guide where I got more done in those six months than the previous two years with plans and hopes to get even more done by this time.

I was walking and getting ready to start hiking later in the spring into the summer. Or so I had planned.

Then everything went flat, literally when during the first week in July, like through the holiday, I was flat on my back in pain from a pinched Siatic nerve where I couldn't stand let alone sit or walk. I finally got to a local Multi-Care clinc to see a physican, get an MRI and a diagnosis of a pinched Siatic nerve, L4 and L5 vertebra.

What happened is that my right leg was either in severe pain or almost totally numb, and my left leg, which went numb last year for 6 weeks, was weak. The left leg got better until Thanksgiving when it got worse where I have problems walking giving me severe shin splints.

The right leg slowly got better where my September only the front of the leg from above the knee to the ankle is numb. Not totally numb to touch but numb to pain and any muscle control. I have managed to get back to walking, although running is out for awhile.

I'm up to 5-6 miles 3-5 days a week depending on my schedule but it always leaves me physically tired the rest of the day. There's no real hope things will get better except maybe slowly over time as the vertebra and the Siatic nerve heals to restore feeling and use in both legs.

I think back to January into the spring where I was walking 6+ miles with 20-25 lbs of groceries with moderate changes in elevation on the route between my home and town. I even looked to adding 2-3 miles until work kept it at 5-6 miles.

Then in September I got a bladder infection which took 3 weeks to get through and over. Gee, thanks for something in unwashed food, the lesson I learned, always wash food, always, completely before eating. Never had it but won't have it again.

That said, both of these just decimated my mind and left my Dysthymia falling into depression. Add to that the realization about a life change which was taking longer than planned reached the end when we finally discovered my digestive problems were exacerbated by the drugs.

Yes, the drugs for one thing was creating worse problems in other areas and my body and mind were revolting. I learned it in the spring but kept trying until October when the last test proved the worst, there is no more to be done with drugs.

I also realized trying to get my personal business up and running over the last two years has exhausted my savings, and then from July with the medical bills I started losing my emergency savings account where I'm at the bottom financially.

By Christmas I was exhausted physically, mentally and financially, and why the new year doesn't look good beyond just trying to get and feel better and crawl out of debt. But it's better than being worse, so I'm not complaining, just bitching at the circumstances, partly my own undoing.

So next year is a tossup for now, and I'll blog here as it progresses.